Sweet Simplicity

What a little charmer!

2011-12-18T22:53:00.001-05:00

It was so cute to watch all the girls swoon over our little guy! And of course, he loved every second of it!

Amazing How They Grow!

2011-11-17T22:28:00.000-05:00

3 months today!

2011-11-17T13:21:00.000-05:00

Has it really been 3 months?! There are somedays where it feels like Kaden has been a part of our lives forever but then I wake up to reality and realize it's only been such a short time. Of course that could be lack of sleep talking too! He is such a joy to us and I can't imagine him not in our lives! He has definitely changed the way we go about things, but in good ways.

2011-10-16T02:22:00.001-04:00

My Stick Family from WiddlyTinks.com

7 weeks

2011-10-10T21:10:00.000-04:00

Just some random pictures from our little guys 7th week with us! :)

HE is the giver of GOOD gifts!

2011-10-06T02:20:00.000-04:00

"If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!" Matthew 7:11

There are some things that have been on my heart since having our little one and since I'm wide awake right now (but should be sleeping since Kaden will be wanting to eat in a few hours!) I thought I would try to put them into actual words here. I never thought I would have the wonderful feeling of being pregnant again and when I found out that I was it was with lots of mixed emotions. I had really come to terms; years before this; with that fact and this really didn't "fit" into what I thought out life was supposed to look like. Just another way God chose to show me that I'm really not in control of my life as much as I would like to think that I am. :) The 7 months that I had to prepare to meet our new little one was quite the journey for me. I went through so many different emotions and I'm thankful that I had that long to deal with them all! It was quite the roller coaster ride to say the least!

If feels almost like yesterday that I held my little guy for the very first time and I can still feel all those emotions that overcame me as I held him in my arms. It's a moment I will never forget! I had no idea just how much this little guy would change my life and fill my heart with such goodness. I know that God had His perfect timing on this and there is no better time than His. I remember going down to the nicu once I was able to get out of bed to see him and the tears that came once I was able to hold him again and how different they were from the ones when I found out I was pregnant. Those tears weren't necessarily the happiest ones as it was something that took me quite by surprise and as I said before had lots to work through with it all. They were definitely bittersweet ones at that time, but as I held him again in that room they turned to tears of joy and gratitude for the beautiful wonderful gift God had blessed us with. It's amazing how our hearts can change and accept what God has planned for us! At that moment, I couldn't imagine my life going any other way than what was happening and that little boy was just the beginning of something new for us; for me.

A couple of weeks after I had Kaden and after we had moved into our new place, I remember sitting on the couch holding him and listening to some praise and worship music and had a moment that I will never forget. It was so peaceful in our house and I was just enjoying snuggling with my little guy. The presence of God was strong in the room and it was like I could almost feel Him sitting right next to me. It was one of those things that hasn't happened to me too often but one that you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that it is Him right there with you and it was so sweet and tender. All of the sudden all I could do was silently weep as I held my little guy and it was like a dam was breaking in my heart. It was as if God was whispering into my heart that "this was His gift to me and there was nothing that I had to do to earn it; it was His pleasure to give it so freely". The years of infertility had taken it's toll on my beat up soul and He was washing it clean as I sat there and held this new perfect baby in my arms and dripped my tears all over his head. It was then that God showed me that I had been holding onto some wrong thoughts and He wanted me to lay them at His feet and that is just what I did. The years and years that I had cried out to Him to bless us with more children had done something to my heart; something that wasn't good. I had built up some walls and some bad thinking that He was bringing to the surface. It was pretty painful to realize and to be feeling those emotions all over again but so very cleansing as well. I had to realize that I had thoughts all along that there was something that I had done to allow me to not get pregnant; something bad that would not allow God to bless me with the gift of more children. It wasn't something that I consciously thought about often but just an attitude that I had developed over the years that carried over into so many areas of my life. And for the first time in a long time, I was coming to terms that there was nothing I could have done or not done to allow that and He was releasing that in me and showing me that He is the giver of good gifts and the timing is all His! It was and forever will be a pivotal moment in my spiritual walk and one that I will hang onto dearly as I just sat there in His presence and let Him love on me as I loved on my little boy.

As I sit here writing this, I'm again listening to worship music and my heart is taking me right back to that moment and just how sweet it was. He is so good to us and wants to give us such good gifts. I can't help to wonder how many times I have refused to take something good from Him when He wanted to give it to me so freely but I was caged up in my own thoughts of unworthiness and unable to accept them. My heartcry is that I will not allow that wall to build up again and allow Him to be who He desires to be in my heart and life. I will forever be changed because of that moment and it's something I will carry with me forever. He is so good to us!

Baby Banner

2011-10-05T22:58:00.001-04:00

Well I didn't get the greatest pictures of these before sending them off today but I still wanted to share them. These are some banners that I made for a baby shower for a friend in Asheville and (if I don't say so myself! lol!) I think they turned out pretty darn cute! Of course, seeing them in person is always better than a flat picture but you get the idea. I really hope to start being able to get busy and put more of my banners in my etsy shop, I just need my life to get stuck from the fast forward button sometime soon! I really love doing this and sharing my creative ideas! :) thanks for peeking!

6 weeks!

2011-10-03T09:11:00.000-04:00

It's pretty hard to believe that our little man is 6 weeks old already! Oh where did that time go! It's definitely been a time of huge adjustment for our little family of 3 but one that we all welcome with big open arms!

At 6 weeks:

*weighs 10lbs 13 oz and 21 1/2 inches long

*down to one feeding at night at about 3 am and that makes his mommy really happy!

*starting to find his voice and it's pretty cute to listen to him!

*has started following us as we talk to him and move around

*having some eating issues and we are trying to figure out if it's reflux or something else so hopefully soon we will have an answer to that

*loves ceiling fans and lights of any kind and will stare at them for long periods of time!

*has the most amazing big sister any little boy could ever have!

*has us all wrapped around his little fingers with vice grips! lol!

Big changes coming for us!

2011-09-30T23:18:00.000-04:00

As if having a baby isn't enough to bring major change into our life, we have decided to do something pretty drastic with our eating habits and are starting on a journey that will make us vegans for at least the next 28 days. I really can't believe that I just typed the word vegan about myself! We have been on a path for some time to becoming healthy and trying to eat better and after a lot of research, it's something we really want to pursue. I'm not sure we will be vegan at the end of what we are going to do for the next 28 days but we will see. We are going to be doing the Engine 2 diet that you can read more about here if you want.

Earlier last week I watched Forks Over Knives and it really opened my eyes to some things that I feel we need to change. I haven't ever really been the type to jump on anyone's bandwagon but really feel there is so much truth in this documentary that makes perfect sense. We really just want to eat right and do something that makes us feel better. We talked about simply going to clean eating and eliminating all processed food from our diet but have decided to just jump in with both feet and give our bodies a huge jumpstart to feeling better. It's going to be a big change for us but one that we are pretty excited to start.

A perfect fall day!

2011-09-30T22:38:00.000-04:00

We visited Faulkners Pumpkin Patch today and had a great time! It was a perfect fall day and it was spent with my favorite people here! ;) So thankful for the friends God has placed in my life and for the memories we are making together. :)

5 weeks!

2011-09-24T18:10:00.000-04:00

It's hard to believe that it's been 5 weeks since our little guy has arrived! It's been a whirlwind of non stop activity here. We have had lots of company wanting to meet little Kaden and it's been fun having them all.

We moved two weeks after I had him and that was quite the adventure to say the least! Having had a c section made things rather interesting for me not being able to help much and I'm very thankful for everyone who was able to help us out. We couldn't have done it without those who came! We are loving our new place and how it just seems to fit us so well. It's a lot smaller but just perfect for our little family right now. Thankfully we have a nice big basement to put all our extra stuff in for the time being while we figure out just what to do with everything. We are enjoying the nice quiet neighborhood too since our last neighborhood brought with it quite the collection of sirens. :)

It's been quite the adjustment realizing that I now have a tween and a newborn and what different worlds they live in and how I have to balance them both. It's going to be a wild ride for sure! Kiersten is the most amazing help and I'm so thankful for all she does to help us out. I did struggle a bit with how far apart they were going to be apart but those thoughts are far from me now after seeing how well it really works.

Sleep is something we really miss these days! Thankfully Kaden is doing pretty good right now and giving us mostly 4 to 5 hour stretches at night and I look forward to the day we get to sleep through the night. Hopefully soon!

I'm enjoying taking lots of pictures of our little man and have hopes of scrapbooking them very soon. One can really hope huh?! lol!

Sometimes I wish I could just stop the clock and freeze so many of these moments in time as I know it's all going to pass way too quickly! Just trying to live in the moment and enjoy each one as they come. :)

Our first week!

2011-08-27T01:29:00.000-04:00

It's pretty hard to believe that it's only been a week since we brought our little baby boy into the world! In some ways it's gone so very fast and in other ways it seems that time has come to a halt in our little world.

Some random thoughts on our first week:

*I have fallen head over heals in love with our little guy

*It's been 12 years since we had a newborn in the house and it's amazing how you remember so much and forget even more!

*Moving a week after you have a c section isn't the smartest thing to do! We don't like to keep things boring in our lives for sure!

*The smell of formula is something you don't ever forget, especially in bottles left sitting that you have to clean

*Having a 12 year old is amazing for a built in helper and she is the best!

*Drugs are our friends! I have a high tolerance for pain but it's much better when I'm on good drugs. :)

*Sleep deprivation is a part of our lives for this time

*Loves the sounds that Kaden makes as he eats...kind of like he is singing to himself

*I could sit and hold my little guy all day if I could!

*I feel closer to my husband in ways I can't even explain right now just knowing that we brought this amazing little boy into the world out of our love for each other

*How quickly baby stuff has taken over our house and how much these little people need!

*Just what you can with lack of sleep amazes me!

*That God has blessed our family in ways I never thought He would in the many years of not being able to conceive and my heart is full

*Our whole vocabulary has changed...our son, the kids, family of 4, brother and sister, sibling...it catches me by surprise sometimes hearing these phrases and knowing they are about us now!

*Being pooped up and peed on by a little boy just isn't that pleasant!

*How this just feels like it completes me in ways I can't even put into words right now

*How amazing it feels to see my husband holding his son

*What amazing husband I have to walk through this with me and how much closer we have become during this pregnancy and delivery

So very thankful for friends!

2011-08-20T09:34:00.000-04:00

Amy flew in from Asheville just to be here with us during the birth of Kaden and it's been wonderful to have her here. It's amazing to have friends that will do this for you and I'm so thankful for her! She has been keeping watch over Kiersten for us and our little pups and it's been great to not have to worry about that stuff while we are here. It's great to have the time to just hang out with her as well since we live so far apart from each other now.

Being in a new place and having a new baby has definitely been not the easiest position to be in and I'm thankful for the friends that God has placed in our path here. Kate and Ashley have been amazing as well helping us out during this time and my heart is filled with thanks for all God has blessed us with here.

And the many well wishes and messages from our friends and family have been overwhelming as well, in a good way! It's been fun reading all our facebook messages and the excitement our little guy has brought.

Kaden in the NICU

2011-08-20T01:55:00.000-04:00

Having to have your baby in the NICU is never anything you want and it was hard to truly comprehend all that was happening but thankful that he was being well taken care of by the wonderful people there. He ended up having to just be in there for 2 days and right now it looks like he will be going home with us once I'm released. It was hard not being able to be with him much during the last 2 days but we knew they were doing what was best for him and that was what was important to us too! He was, of course, the biggest guy there and the nurses there loved him! It was amazing to walk by the little little babies there and made us even more thankful for him and that things could always be different with him. But no matter what we knew God had him in His hands and everything was going to be just fine. Due to his breathing issues, they had to feed him through a tube in his nose and he had to do that for the first 24 hours. The last 24 hours we were able to feed him with the bottle but he still had to stay in the NICU for monitoring. They were trying to figure out the why of his breathing issues and had to do lots of testing. They ended up finding a small heart murmur and some issues that will hopefully clear themselves by the time he is 1 to 2 months old. Since he was a full term baby we ill just have to take him to see a cardiologist when he is 1 to 2 months old to see if the issues have corrected themselves and we are hopeful that that will be what happens.

He was released from the NICU tonight and we are elated! Now he gets to be in the room with us and we can really get in our baby time! And I really should be sleeping right now but my back is hurting from the spinal and the pain meds don't seem to be touching it much. ugh!

Our Second Miracle!

2011-08-20T01:39:00.000-04:00

It still feels so surreal to be holding our second little miracle in our hands tonight! We had a hard time getting pregnant with Kiersten and really thought she would forever be our only child and had come to terms with that. Well God obviously had different plans since we just welcomed our second miracle into the world on Wednesday August 17th at 10:34 am. God is SO good! Even when it's not what we had planned. As I sit and star at him it's hard to not get overwhelmed at just how much of a miracle he really is!

His delivery was so different from Kiersten's too and in much better ways! With her I had 20 hours of labor and then a c-section. Kaden was a planned c-section and things went just as planned. Just the way I like them since I'm a self proclaimed control freak! lol! The only issue during the c-section was my first spinal didn't take so I had to have another one and thankfully that one was pure bliss! They were going to have to put me completely under if that one didn't take and then Steve would not have been able to come in and that would have been very sad. I think the tears I cried when they told me that really made them make sure it worked the second time around. I needed my man by my side!

Kaden had some issues from the very start with his breathing so we were in the OR longer than normal while they worked on him and also tied my tubes. As much as we love babies we don't want anymore surprises! Two miracles are about this mama can take in one lifetime! :)

Kiersten could not wait to come meet her new little brother and she is one of the happiest little girls right now! Due to his breathing issues, she couldn't hold him right away and that was hard for her but I think she will be making up that time very soon! He hadn't been put in the NICU yet but they were monitoring his rapid breathing and just Steve and I were allowed to hold him with skin to skin contact. Kiersten wasn't happy about that but she understood. They didn't want him stressed out anymore than he already was and were trying to get his breathing under control. Unfortunately, he earned himself a ticket into the NICU and spent the next 2 days there. We are very thankful to be at a hospital with a level 3 NICU right now the hallway so we didn't have to be too separated from him. I couldn't go down to feed him until they cleared me to get out of bed so Steve and Kiersten had that task. I don't think Kiersten minded one bit!

My heart is so full right now! Holding my new little guy and hardly believing we are here!

He is truly our second little miracle!

39 Weeks!

2011-08-17T04:25:00.001-04:00

I can hardly believe that the end is finally in site and that end is one I never would have put myself in! lol! So many emotions going through my head right now and of course can't sleep too well. I'm so excited to meet our new little one! Not to mention be done with the whole being pregnant part! I do have to say that I have enjoyed it for the most part, especially thinking it would never happen again after so many years of praying, crying and waiting. I'm pretty nervous about the whole doctor/c-section thing, but I know it will be okay. Me and doctors just don't mix too well so I'm praying it all goes smoothly tomorrow and the pain won't be too much.

I had no idea that Kiersten was going to be our last one at the time we had her, or so I thought! lol! In the 12 years since I've had her I've often wished that I had known as there would have been so many more things I would have enjoyed about being pregnant and just knowing that this was the last. Little did I know there was just going to be a 12 year stretch between them! With this one, I know and it just feels different. I know it's the last time a baby will ever be inside me (of course, unless God has other plans of which I'm unaware of and that wouldn't surprise me!) But then the doctors that do the tubal ligation tomorrow with have some answers to be talking about! And of course with Kiersten I was so sick the whole time I was just more than ready to be done. I enjoyed the pregnancy but not like I have been able to this one in different ways. There's just something about knowing that this will be your last that makes it different.

Things I won't miss...
*getting up to pee about every hour
*having to sleep on my side (I miss my stomach!)
*nausea
*not being able to even get up from the couch without your husband's help! seriously?!
*my lovely shrek feet and hands
*not being able to breathe
*the intense heartburn I've had that literally wakes me up from a dead sleep

Things I will miss...
*feeling him inside me and just knowing that he is safe and such a part of me
*people answering my calls no matter what thinking I've gone into labor! lol-this cracks me up!
*Kiersten and Steve being able to feel him kick inside me and talking with him

Things I'm looking forward too...
*finally seeing his little face and being able to hold him
*sleeping someday!
*sleeping on my tummy someday!
*the joy that I know I will see tomorrow on my husbands and daughters face as we welcome little Kaden into our lives
*being a family of 4

So many thoughts!

I'm just filled with awe and wonder as I sit here even typing this and the simple fact that this is my life. Wow...I'm going to have a baby in about 61/2 hours and that almost seems crazy! Off to try to get some more sleep as tomorrow a whole new chapter will begin in our lives and I'm pretty excited to say the least!

21 days left!

2011-07-26T22:56:00.000-04:00

I need to get some better pictures but this is one of my big belly and it is REALLY big right now! I'm definitely getting to that very uncomfortable stage and I'm ready to be done! It's getting harder and harder to sleep at night between being just uncomfortable and having to get up and pee every hour or two. It's not much fun at all! I have started taking naps in the afternoon out of necessity to just make it through my day right now. :)

I'm struck tonight with just how fast this has gone for me. Of course right now I feel like it's dragging, but in the big picture I'm just amazed that it's almost over. I'm so ready to meet our little guy! I'm ready to have my body back for sure! The simple fact that I never thought I would ever be pregnant again is never a thought that is far from my mind. Especially as I feel him moving inside me and the miracle that I know he is! It's still not what we planned but I've come to terms with it all and that my life is not my own and God knew all along what was best for us.

21 days until we meet our little guy and I'm ready! ;)

Baby Showers

2011-07-09T14:31:00.000-04:00

I've had two baby showers and it all still seems so crazy! Sitting there opening baby presents kind of feels like it's not really me sitting there doing it. It does help the excitement level to see all the cute baby things though and to know that very soon there will be a little one to use all of them. Still amazed at the little second miracle God has blessed us with every day!

Here are some pictures from the baby shower I had in Ohio that my mom and sister put together. My sister did an amazing job on the decorations!

We just got back from Asheville, NC and I had another baby shower there with our friends and here are some pictures from there. I am feeling very blessed by all of this in so many ways!

Some Etsy Custom orders...

2011-07-09T13:52:00.000-04:00

I know it's been awhile since I've blogged! Life has been a little busy I guess. Busy getting ready for our new little one for sure!

I've also been busy with some custom orders from my etsy shop and I have loved working on these banners. Just wanted to show them off here too.

Drum roll please.....

2011-05-19T02:35:00.000-04:00

it's been a long process of searching and searching for just the right name and we have finally decided!

Now we just have to pick out a middle name and we are done! ;)

My Etsy Shop!

2011-05-14T23:08:00.000-04:00

I have been wanting and meaning to do this for a long time now but just kept putting it off. I am proud to say that's my etsy shop is finally up and running! Granted I only have 1 item in it, but it's a start! I have more to put up but for now that will have to do.

I have a passion to share my work with others and hopefully this will be a way to do just that! I so enjoy the process of creating something that I know will help bring a special memory to someone somewhere.

Here is my first piece of work that I'm selling...

I hope to be able to make some extra moolah to help us breathe a little easier since things are pretty tight right now. I know a lot of us feel that way and I'm just trying to do my part and help my wonderful hard working amazing husband out just a little. :) You can check out my shop here is you want to take a look.

Here is my logo that I made up for the shop as well. :)

Pieces of my home...

2011-04-29T17:59:00.001-04:00

I love making our house a home and wanted to share a bit of it here. If you want to see in a little closer you can just click on the picture to make it bigger.

This is our homeschool/scrapbook/office room and one of my favorites. It's has a wall of rounded windows that I love. And, as you can see, our little Izzy loves to perch herself on the chair and look out the windows. And of course bark at everyone walking by!

My scrapbooking table (that is a little messy right now)

This is where we do most of our homeschooling. We haven't ever had a dedicated place to do our school so this is new for us and I quite like it. We have just worked on the kitchen table but we don't have a new one just yet so this works just great. I also scrapbook here too sometimes if I want to sit down. I usually stand and scrapbook but this is nice to have in case I want to sit.

This is our hallway and what you see as you walk up our stairs into our apartment.

Our living room

These are some frames that we used for our trade show booth for layouts and I loved being able to use them here too! Love being able to put some of my favorite scrapbook pages up for display too and see them all th time.

My lovely big door I got for $10 at a garage sale in North Carolina! Love it!

This is looking into our dining room from our living room

The fireplace in our living room. I love windows and doors...can you tell?! :)

This is a cabinet that was left here and it has worked out great for us. We quite like it!

Kitchen. Steve has painted two of our walls and needs to paint the rest the red that we have picked out. Can't wait!

The storage in the kitchen isn't much to get excited about so I have used these metal shelves and I quite like them as well. Kinda of nice having my stuff readily available

The opposite end of our hallway leading down to our bathroom and our bedroom. That's all for now!

A Real Labor of Love! :)

2011-04-24T21:07:00.000-04:00

My sister was here last week and put her heart and soul into doing our nursery and it looks AMAZING! I am so impressed with all that she did and came up with and how wonderful it all looks together. It was a lot of fun watching and helping her (a little!) and seeing it all come together. The above picture is what you see as you walk into our bedroom and look into the nursery. It is actually a dressing room/closet that is right off of our bedroom. The only bad part about it all is that the nursery looks so great now; walking through our room to get to it makes ours look so dreary!

This is the quilt that she made before coming and just has to have it "quilted" know once she gets back to Ohio. It's her first one and she did a wonderful job!

This hangs on the crib and will hold odds and ends for the little one.

This is a wall hanging she made that will eventually have the name of our little one once we decide on it. She tried to get us to pick but we just aren't ready and definitely not something we want to rush into. We are close but not 100% sure on it just yet.

Custom made curtains that started out as just some red prebought ones from Walmart that she fancied up quite a bit! Love them!

We found these wall hangings at Gordman's and they couldn't be more perfect to go with everything.

A lamp that was on clearance at Gordman's and I had the shade and she added her special touches to it to make it pretty darn cute.

Remember these round decorative tables that have been around forever? Well Heidi had to have one and we literally searched just about everywhere in Kansas City to find one and were finally successful on a last ditch effort to Hancock's. I think I heard the angels sing when it was finally found or that could of just been my big sigh of relief knowing that our search had come to an end and we could rest a bit! lol!

A changing table we found for $20 on craigslist that fits right in. She added some fabric to the baskets that looks really cute but I need to get a different picture for that. She also made a cover for the changing pad that matches the bumpers on the crib.

Found this rocker of craigslist as well for $40 and it fits in perfectly.

And at last, the infamous Heidi finishing up the last bits of the nursery before calling it quits. And the signature tongue on the lips that seems to be a family thing as we all concentrate on doing crafty things! lol! I do the same thing! So very thankful for my sister and all the wonderful work that she did this week for our new little addition. So very blessed by her labor of love and can't tell her enough just how much it means to me. :) Love ya sis! ;)

Baby Nursery Part 1

2011-04-16T13:10:00.001-04:00

I sure do love having a painter for a husband! ;) He just finished painting the baby nursery and I LOVE it! I was going to just do all brown but Steve thought the teal we picked out for the kitchen went perfectly with the nursery colors and it did! I think he knows a little about colors! :) And of course my boy is never far from me no matter where I'm at so he got his picture taken too. :)

Oh BOY!!!!

2011-04-16T13:00:00.000-04:00

I'm sure most have heard by now but I haven't had a chance to blog here about it and get some of those emotions out just yet. We are officially having a boy! I have to say that I wasn't in the least bit shocked as my husband said from the very beginning that he thought it was a boy. He said the same thing about Kiersten being a girl and there are just some things he says that I don't doubt and this was one of them. I just lived in denial until we knew for sure. And boy (no punn intended!) did he make it very clear during our ultrasound! He is a very proud little boy! lol! I really think I'm still getting over the shock of just being pregnant right now and this will take a little while to set in. I am just very thankful that it is a very healthy little boy and that no matter what God has it all under control. We had a extensive ultrasound where they look for lots of different things that could be wrong and measurements and from what they could see he seems to be a perfectly healhty little boy. For that, I'm thankful for!

Afterwards Kiersten and I did a little retail therapy that really helped us get in the mood for a little boy. They do make some really cute stuff thankfully. It's just different from anything I have ever known or wanted but I am just so thankful that God knows me better than I even know myself. :) We are in store for a whole new adventure and I can't wait to meet our little guy in August!

**will post some ultrasound pictures later!**

cankles!

2011-04-03T19:25:00.000-04:00

I sure wish my cankles looked cute! Not so much when you are an adult and pregnant! Definitely feeling the down side of pregnancy these days. I could barely get my wedding ring off today and think I may be keeping it off for awhile now just to be safe. How sad! :( I don't remember swelling much with Kiersten until the last month so this is new for me. I'm already thinking of the long hot summer I'm going to have to endure here in Missouri and dreading it!

And my pregnancy brain somehow mixed up that my appointment where we get to find out the sex is not tomorrow but Tuesday. ugh! At least it's just one day difference and not any longer! So Tuesday is our big day!

Do we buy this....

or this...

that is the question that will be answered on Tuesday! So stay tuned! ;)

Is this not the cutest?!

2011-04-02T21:30:00.001-04:00

I'm starting to gather some ideas for possibly baby shower things and this is one that I LOVE! It was actually for my friend's little girls 6th birthday but I think it would make the perfect baby shower idea!

Our 2nd Miracle!

2011-04-02T10:03:00.001-04:00

I was sitting looking at some of my scrapbook albums the other day and came across this layout and it really went straight to my heart. I remember the day I made this and journaled all about the fact of being thankful for the one miracle we were given in our little girl. It was sort of a "coming to terms" moment in knowing that she would be our only one. Now as I look back it kind of makes me giggle knowing the God had different plans all along but ones we had no idea about. :)

It has definitely been a big shock finding out I was pregnant after 12 years of nothing and at times it's been hard. I had come to terms with having just one amazing little girl and had set my heart towards that. I was happy with our little family of three. The longings in my heart to add to our family had long passed. I hadn't prayed those desperate prayers of want for a very very very long time! The realization that we would have children 12 years apart and we would pretty much be starting all over with everything was, at first, hard to swallow. And I have to admit I still have days where I'm just still in shock of it all! The first few weeks after finding out were a rollercoaster ride of emotions. My poor husband! There were more tears shed in those times than I had cried in a very long time! Tears of happiness; tears of relief knowing that God does hear our prayers; tears of sorrow for the years we tried and nothing and now this; tears of joy; tears of unbelief; just lots and lots of tears! I think I scared our daughter into never wanting to get pregnant in how emotional I was!

There haven't been many tears since that time as I think I'm back in the shock mode of being pregnant. Reality is starting to set in. I still can't seem to look at a whole lot of baby stuff yet because it just doesn't feel real sometimes. Of course, being sick all the time makes it more of a reality than I want sometimes but it's still good! I think I'm waiting until we know for sure what we are having to get real exited and to start looking at all the cute baby stuff. I know it's a whole different world than it was when we had our girl. No more cutsie diaper bags with bears all over them! I want the cool one! :)

So we are on the verge of our 2nd miracle and I'm so thankful that God has everything under control and we can just sit back and trust in Him. I honestly don't know how I would have handled this without Him and knowing that there is a much bigger picture in all this that we may never even see. Our lives our in His hands and I'm thankful they are big hands that can hold a lot! Things are about to change in crazy ways for us here and we are going to need those big hands to carry us through!

Which will it be?!

2011-03-31T21:09:00.000-04:00

Monday is our big day when we get to find out what we are having, boy or girl! I'm very excited but also very nervous! I have to be totally honest and say that I never wanted boys even when we thought we would have more after Kiersten. It was just something I never desired. And now of course, many are telling me I'm going to have a boy since our first was a girl and especially since I really don't want one. I know I'm bad for even saying that but it's the truth. So I'm glad we are finding out soon so, IF it's a boy, I'll have a good amount of time to prepare myself for the shock of it. So if you are the mom of a boy, please tell me your good boy stories so I can be excited about little boys! I have to say I have seen some really cute ones lately! I know I will be happy no matter what we have because I know that this is a gift from God and in His perfect timing. :) But if it's a boy I'll just need a little more time to prepare myself for the little one. :)

Revamping the blog...

2011-03-30T12:53:00.000-04:00

so please be patient as I play around a little! I've been a pretty sporadic blogger of late and I"m feeling the need to get more out there. :)

It's Real!

2011-02-09T14:31:00.000-05:00

Last week was our first visit to the doctor and our first ultrasound. As I sat there laying on the table, my heart felt like it was about to burst. I knew I was pregnant already, but actually seeing the baby for the first time was blowing my mind a bit! After you deal with infertility for so long it almost feels senseless to hold on to hope at times and I had given up on quite awhile ago actually. My mind was struggling with my age, the timing of it all and just the simple fact of could this really be?! All the years of crying out to God to open up my womb again with nothing but silence had come to an end. And it had been a couple of years since I had really even thought about it anymore. I had come to terms with our little family of three and was, quite honestly, pretty happy with it! We were really going to be starting over again? So many thoughts rushing through my head as the doctor squeezed some warm jelly on my stomach and all of the sudden my world stopped. The baby appeared on the screen and all I could think of is "it's real!" It's not some joke I dreamed up or some nightmare I wanted to forget about. There is an actual baby growing inside me and one that only God could have put there. 11 years of infertility and finally a baby. Not the timing that I would have chose at all, but I'm coming to terms with that. And then just peace...sweet peace that only comes from the Father! You know the phrase "seeing is believing"? well that was what I needed to move forward with so many of my emotions that were whirling around in my head and heart. I just layed there in complete utter peace watching the baby move around on the screen and for the first time since taking the pregnancy tests I had complete peace. Beautiful sweet peace. Peace in knowing that God was in complete control of this time; peace in knowing that I didn't have to understand it all; peace that He was going to take care of all our worries and needs; peace that this baby was truly a gift from Him and He was going to take care of everything. We are starting quite a new journey ahead and it's going to be very interesting to say the least. :)

Still in shock!!!!

2011-01-20T04:00:00.001-05:00

Yep, that pretty much sums up how I'm feeling right now! This week has been a whirlwind of new beginnings and one that I didn't think would ever happen! And, quite honestly, had stopped hoping for a long time ago! So you can imagine my surprise upon taking a pregnancy test because I hadn't been feeling too well for awhile and I have done that throughout the years to simply rule it out since I'm not that regular, and seeing it turn "pregnant" SO very quickly I didn't even have time to catch my breath! Yes I just about hyperventilated! The test said the results will show up in three minutes but I didn't get MY 3 minutes! lol! I think I'm going to write the company and tell them I want my 3 minutes before my world went upside down! :) So 4 tests later, you know one has to be sure about these things, I'm still very pregnant and to say the least in utter complete shock!

And to be honest, I"m still not too sure of my emotions with all of this! For the first 2 days I just laughed! Really laughed! And then last night the tears came hard. I'm excited, scared, filled with awe, a little dreadful of the whole pregnancy thing, nervous, filled with complete joy, shocked and I'm sure more that I can't even put a name to just yet. This is something that we have prayed for for years and something that took us by complete surprise! I hadn't prayed for this in a LONG time! God has definitely shown us that His timing is not ours! I'm still trying to wrap my brain around it all! The one thing I do know for sure is that He is faithful and His ways are far better than any we could try to make happen! I'm going to have a baby at 39! I always said that if nothing happen by 35 then that was it. Well when you try for so long you just stop thinking about it eventually. And of course, since we had tried so long we figured we surely didn't need to use any kind of protection! What a silly concept huh?! I don't think I"m laughing at that now! :) But you know we have only done the "deed" twice so I guess we should have tried sooner! LOL! Guess we are 2 for 2 now! Just took a little longer to get around to the second time. :)

We told Kiersten a few nights ago and she was pretty happy, to say the least! She has been asking to adopt vigorously for years and now she can finally stop asking that question because she is going to be a big sister! I think that is the most exciting part of it all for me right now. Having only one girl and knowing she would have no immediate family if something were to ever happen to us, has always made me sad to think upon. But now she will have a little sister/brother to watch over and they will be together. That alone brings me to tears of thankfulness! She is beyond excited and already making stuff for the baby! She it too cute!

We knew we were going to have new beginnings when we left Asheville, but this was definitely something that never crossed my mind that could be one of them! I have to admit that I have been a little sad not being around familiar things during all of this but God is good and has placed people in my life here to fill that need. But you can bet I'm going back to Asheville for the biggest baby shower ever! :) Okay I'm so not ready to even think about that stuff!

So here is our nice little family of three that just found out we are now 4! Thank you Papa for your faithfulness! We are overwhelmed by it all and don't understand the timing but thankful just the same! Praying the shock will wear off soon! I found this quote the other day and it pretty much sums up how we are feeling right now.

“A baby is God's opinion that life should go on. Never will a time come when the most marvelous recent invention is as marvelous as a newborn baby. The finest of our precision watches, the most super-colossal of our supercargo planes don't compare with a newborn baby in the number and ingenuity of coils and springs, in the flow and change of chemical solutions, in timing devises and interrelated parts that are irreplaceable.” Carl Sandburg

I Heart Photos Pet Faces

2010-12-13T17:15:00.002-05:00

It's been a long time since I entered this contest for sure! So here is to starting something again that I loved!

I loved this photo of our new puppy and it was contrived at all! Our cocker was laying on the couch and the new little one just snuck up right under his paws and went to sleep! It was SO cute!

Check out the other entries here and make sure you have your "awwwss!!" ready! :)

Around the World Geography Co-Op Week 1 and 2 Holland

2010-11-16T13:13:00.000-05:00

We are in our second week of Holland for our geography co-op. It's exciting to be on our second country already. Loving the group that has been put together and getting to know the moms and their kids. So far we have...

*Learning about the location of Holland and whether you call it Holland or The Netherlands or both!

*Watched a cute video about Holland that you can find here if you want to see... here

*Tried two different cheeses from Holland and got to have a taste testing

*Learned about wooden shoes and where they originated from and even got to touch and try on a real pair directly from Holland

*Made a cute are project made by a mom from Holland that you can check out here if you want

*Learned about tulips and how they got started and the history behind them

*Learned about the artist Rembrandt and Piet Mondrian

3 more weeks of the journey through Holland to go!

What would your sign say?

2010-11-09T10:03:00.000-05:00

I read this blog yesterday and it really hit me...in a good way. It made me think about the sign that would be around my neck. And about the people around me and what I would see around their's. It's been a pretty emotional time these past few months and I know depending on the day, I could where I different sign each one. Yesterday I think my sign would have said, "I'm so lonely and fighting off depression and trying to pull myself out of this so please be gentle with me" I"m trying to be thankful for the little things and know that there are so many worse places I could be. One day at a time is what I'm trying to do right now. My prayer is that I will have compassion for those around me that I know could be carrying signs just like this around their necks. And that no matter what sign you may be wearing I will be gentle and understanding with you. I know someday I will look back on this time and hopefully see the good that has come out of it but for now I'm just trying to get through each day, one step at a time.

The Land Between

2010-11-02T10:08:00.002-04:00

"It occurs to me it is not so much the aim of the devil to lure me with evil as it is to preoccupy me with the meaningless. " — Donald Miller

This past month or I should say months have been pretty hard for me. It was kind of like life just stopped being fun (for the lack of any better word) maybe interesting would be more like it. Emotions were coming out of me that I didn't know what to do with. My answer as of late, was to just sleep. Amazing how you just don't feel anything when you sleep...it's a wonderful thing! But the problem with sleeping, is that you have to wake up sometime and the emotions are right there in your face yet again.

I started a book a couple of days ago that has spoke to that place in my heart that I so needed it to. God has been speaking to me all along I know but for some reason, today my ears are hearing again. The book is called The Land Between and here is one quote that really spoke to me...

"I firmly believe that the Land Between - that space where we feel lost or lonely or deeply hurt - is fertile ground for our spiritual transformation and for God's grace to be revealed in magnificent ways. But in addition to being the bearer of mercy, I also have the privilege of challenging God's people to holiness, and while the Land Between is prime real estate for faith transformation, it is also the space where we can grow resentful, bitter, and caustic if our responses are unguarded. The wilderness where faith can thrive is the very desert where it can dry up and die if we are not watchful."

It was more than just moving that put me in this spot. It's something that I'm still trying to put my finger on completely but what matters now is that I see I have been making the choice to not allow God to use this time for something good. Today I'm choosing to not let the devil preoccupy me with meaningless. I have purpose and even if I don't know what that is right now in this spot, I can still do something. I don't know what that is just yet but instead of sleeping my time away I'm going to do something different. It begins with one step and today I'm taking that one step to something different; something positive. One step at a time...I know that is all God asks of me and I'm thankful that I know that step is in the right direction today. And thankful for the many ways God has used others to speak to me, especially in the past few days.

It was a different Halloween...but good

2010-11-01T09:56:00.000-04:00

This Halloween was definitely a good but also a little bittersweet! I was really missing our regualar group of trick or treaters that we always spent the time with. It was one of those moments where I realized that last year was our last year together and that my pictures of that time were the last. :( So we had to make new memories this year. Thankfully we are in a neighborhood right now where Kiersten has made some good friends and we walked around with them. It was fun but bittersweet.

I'm grieving...

2010-10-27T22:31:00.000-04:00

that is the best word I could come up with for what I've been going through lately. I'm grieving so many things...
...the home I thought we would have forever in Asheville, NC
...the friends that I thought would be around me always and in my daily life
...the dreams of seeing my girl grow up with her best friends
...the memories that won't be made anymore in that place
...the laughter and realness I had with my close girlfriends there
...the ability to hang out at our friends homes
...the intimate relationships
...the beautiful mountains
...a business dying that took years to build up for my husband
....just so much!

I know beyond any shadow of a doubt that we are right where the Lord has brought us and we walked that out in obedience but it doesn't make it easy in the least! It has really hit me hard this month and it's been a process dealing with all the emotions of it. Tears and lonliness hit me at the strangest time sometimes. Anger is there too. Questioning why this so many times during the day. Will I ever have any of the above again? I think that is one of my greatest struggles right now. I long for those relationships and I know they didn't happen overnight in Asheville but this part is just so hard. Somedays I just want to close myself off and not have to deal with all the emotions that come with this new territory. Depression has been knocking on my door almost daily and it's a fight to keep it out most days.

But I have to tell myself that God is in control and our life is in His hands. Some days are easier than others to believe that. He knows the tears I cry, the lonliness I feel, the fighting against the depression I have to do, the questions I have, the uncertainty of it all. And I know He is okay with all of that. He is bigger than any of these emotions.

I'm trying to fill my days with music that draws me closer to Him and I fall back on some old songs that got me through some dark times. This is one of them...

Holy, You are still holy
Even when the darkness surrounds my life
Sovereign, You are still sovereign
Even when confusion has blinded my eyes
Lord, I don't deserve Your kind affection
When my unbelief has kept me from Your touch
I want my life to be a pure reflection
Of Your love
And so I come into Your chamber
And I dance at Your feet, Lord
You are my Saviour
And I'm at Your mercy
All that has been in my life
Up 'til now
It belongs to You
You are still holy
Holy, You are still holy
Even though I don't understand Your ways
Sovereign, You will be sovereign
Even when my circumstances don't change
Lord, I don't deserve your tender patience
When my unbelief has kept me from Your truth
I want my life to be a sweet devotion
To You
And so I come into Your chamber
And I dance at Your feet, Lord
You are my Saviour
And I'm at Your mercy
All that has been in my life
Up 'til now
It belongs to You
I belong to You
And so I come into Your chamber
And I dance at Your feet
You are my Saviour
And I'm at Your mercy
All that has been in my life
Up 'til now
It belongs to You
I belong to You
You are still holy
You are still sovereign
You are still holy, Lord
You are still righteous
You are all-knowing
You are still holy

Around the World Geography Co-Op Week 6 Thailand

2010-10-24T19:57:00.000-04:00

We finished up our last week of Thailand this past Friday and it was so much fun! We started our day with the lapbooking session, where the kids made lapbooks with all the things the moms had given them through the last 5 weeks. It was fun to watch all their creative styles come out as they played with all the different stuff we provided with them to make their lapbooks.

We ended our study of Thailand with a dinner of Thai food that the moms cooked. Then the kids got to show us their lapbooks and tell us about what they learned the last 5 weeks. It was so fun to see what each one remembered and what was each favorites part of it all. It was a great time! So thankful for the great groups of moms and kids that have gathered together for this co-op! You all are the best! Can't wait to study our next county of Holland!

The Amercan Girl doll store..

2010-10-16T19:43:00.000-04:00

Kiersten has been wanting to go here since she learned it was close by and today we finally went. I earned some good mommy points on this one for sure! It's nice to know that it's so close by so we can go back when we want and not have to go crazy! We got Nikki's hair done and Kiersten got some accessories she has been wanting. I have one happy girl!

Around the World Geography Co-Op Week 5 Thailand

2010-10-16T19:37:00.000-04:00

This was our last week of Thailand and it was so fun to see all that we have learned! Next week we have our lapbook session and then our dinner later in the evening, which I can't wait for! It has been a wonderful journey and one that I'm so excited to have such a great group of moms and kids come along with me! This week we talked about:

*2 dog species that are orginially from Thailand and one cat and watched a you tube video on one of the dogs

*3 missions from the L.I.F.E. organiztion that help woman help themselves

*The tickle plant and one of the largest plants in the world that smells like rotting meat (gross!)

*Shadow puppets

*Thai food that Becky cooked for us that the kids loved!

Kiersten's favorite meal!

2010-10-12T18:24:00.000-04:00

Sometimes it's just the simple things that make life happy and for my girl this is one of her favorite meals! Couldn't get much simpler than this! Of course, I think it helps that the first time we had this was in Colorado when we were visiting friends and it just happens to be her best friends favorties too!

2 cans of Amy's Organix Lentil Vegetable Soup
1 lb ground turkey breast
Brown Rice

Easy Peasy! ;) It's one of the very quick nice to have on hand kind of meals that we love!

Check out our new venture!

2010-10-12T15:47:00.000-04:00

My sister and I are up to something again and you can check it out on our new blog here. It all started with Heidi just talking to me about the idea of candy buffets and stations and it all went from there. Heidi has already done two parties up in Ohio and I"ve made the "artsy" stuff to go with them. I'm not sure where I'll take this here, in this area, but I'm excited to be helping out my sister in what she is doing. I would love to be able to do this but just need some friends to volunteer to let me do it at their speical occasions! Unfortunately the downside of moving and not knowing too many people yet!

Here is the logo I designed for it and I think it's pretty cute! (if I don't say so myself! lol!)

Around the World Geography Co-Op Week 4 Thailand

2010-10-10T14:24:00.000-04:00

Our 4th week of Thailand:

*Tried Tamrind Candy

*Talked about a traditional Thailand Wedding

*Learned about one of the smallest creatures called the Bumblebee Bat that is no bigger than the tip of your thumb!

*More fruit from Thailand that we actually got to touch, see and taste!

*Decorated a bandana with an elephant, which is a very importnat part of Thailand

Loving Eleven!

2010-10-05T12:07:00.001-04:00

I am so loving this age with my girl! I always thought the little ages were my favorite, and I did love them, but eleven is so fun! I'm seeing so much maturity in her and it's beautiful to watch. I'm so thankful for the one blessing God gave us in this beautiful girl!

Just some of the things I'm loving about my girl today:
*she is so creative! She can make or sew just about anything she sees and I'm pretty impressed with that! she has made a whole house for her American Girls out of cardboard and sews great clothes for them out of pieces of fabric we find.
*she is a gift giver and always has been. She loves to give gifts and is always thinking of ways to surprise others. I love that!
*she is a hard worker.
*she is doing so well in school this year and I really think we have turned a big corner when it comes to school
*she is sassy and sarcastic, but in a good way. She makes us laugh all the time with her ways of saying things
*she has adjusted so well to our move and I'm so proud of her. We still don't have the friends around us like we did in Asheville but they are coming and I'm loving the ones we have been able to meet so far
*she has started making her bed everyday and her room has stayed clean for weeks now! I don't know what has happened but I'm liking it and hoping it sticks around!
*she has a laugh that is just contagious
*she is loving the church we are going to and I'm excited to see her faith growing in leaps and bounds
*she is not afraid to ask anyone if they are a christian and if not then why!
*she can play with just about any age
*she is amazing with little kids and I think she will have a great babysitting career in the future!
*she flips and does backflips all over the house and I love that she loves gymnastics so much
*the simple fact that she is ours and I couldn't imagine our life without her!

Around the World Geography Co-Op Week 3 Thailand

2010-10-02T19:18:00.000-04:00

This week we learned about:

*225 rules that Buddist Monks must obey and the kids thought the no tickling and no frightening ones were the silliest!

*Instruments that they use in Thailand and the different sounds they make

*Famous people that live in Thailand

*The Monkey Feast (a feast that is given to monkeys because they are considered gods in the area) There are over 2000 monkeys that roam this city!

*Orchids, the national flower of Thailand and the kids got to pick a bloom from one for them to keep

Halloween cake pops!

2010-10-02T18:58:00.000-04:00

We love to make cake pops so we made them for a lock-in that Kiersten was to this weekend. They were a big hit and we had lots of fun making them!

Around the World Geography Co-Op Week 2 Thailand

2010-09-29T15:23:00.000-04:00

This was our second week studying Thailand.

This was our second week studying Thailnad. We talked about elephants, what it means to be Buddhist, essential Thai cooking ingredients, missionaries who run orphanages, art from Thailand and the Durian fruit.

I'm so thankful for the wonderful group of moms that have joined me in doing this and they are doing such an amazing job! Thanks ladies for coming along with me on this journey around the world with our kids! ;)

Geography Through Art

2010-09-29T14:43:00.001-04:00

Kiersten is taking a Geography Through Art class from a local artist and they were studying Africa yesterday and this is what she came home with. I was quite impressed (of course I think she's pretty talented anyways!) but just loved what she came home with.

Around the World Geography Co-Op

2010-09-20T20:13:00.000-04:00

Friday was our first Around the World Geography Co-Op and it went really well! It was a little bittersweet for me since me and some friends from Asheville started this there and I really miss them, but good to be able to share this and see others secited about it too. We have a little bigger group than I expected but I think they all work well together. We have 7 moms and 19 kids ( of which 17 of them are girls!). Thankfully the two boys we have are at least the same age and used to being around a lot of girls since they both have 3 sisters. I'm looking forward to a great time with some great ladies and their kids. :)

We (Rachel, Rebekah and I) came up with the idea for this co-op after attending a Five in a Row conference and on our trip home formed it into a group. We had five moms and 11 kids there. The concept is to study a county for 6 weeks and each mom is responsible for one of 5 areas:

Geography/History
Culture
Missions/Famous People
Animals/Plants
Music/Art

Eash mom presents a 5-15 minute lesson on their chosen area each week and gives the kids some kind of visual to help them remember what they talked about. The kids collect all of the little pieces for the 6 weeks and put them in their folder. On the 6th week we gather together and the kids put together lapbooks or notebooks that represent our 6 weeks together on that country. Later the same night we all get together for a cultral dinner experience where each family brings a dish to share based on a recipe from that specific country. After we all eat, the kids then present their lapbooks to us and share their favorite parts about what they have studied for the last 6 weeks and the older ones may present a report they have put together as well. It give them a little public speaking experience and it also gives the dads an opportunity to be in on a part of our schooling that not many of them get to be a part of. Not to mention some great fellowship time for the parents to get to know each other and hang out and the kids to have some social time as well. We usually study about 5 to 6 countries during the year.

I put together the notebooks for the kids to have to keep all their visuals in and also these pencils. Aren't they cute?! I saw them in a Creating Keepsakes magazine and thought they were too cute and made them for all the kids. All they are is yellow cardstock wrapped around a pack of Rolo's, pink cardstock for the eraser and then foil for "metal" on the pencil. Very easy and fun!

Scrapbook Pages

2010-09-18T09:19:00.000-04:00

Wow...it's been a long time!

2010-08-11T14:57:00.000-04:00

My life has pretty much turned into a few sentence updates on facebook these days and the blog has been left on the wayside! Sorry to anyone that follows...I'll try better here. :) We will see how that goes.

I was excited this morning to see my photo as one of the finalist for a grandparent photo contest I entered and wanted to put that out here for those that aren't on facebook. You can vote for me if you want...I'm #20!

Here is the picture a little bigger with the details I so love with the contrast of the new skin against the old. This is my grandma holding her first great great grandchild. You can vote by clicking on this link...

http://www.kcparent.com/Giveaways/GrandparentPhotoContest.aspx

Our one room school house!

2010-04-21T15:50:00.001-04:00

I couldn't resist taking this photo yesterday as I watched my girl doing her math and thinking of how much we do in this room lately. It truly feels like the old fashioned one room schoolhouse where they did everything! Not that we can't go somewhere else to do school; it just works well here. My bed has become the place I do most things these days and I feel like I'm back in college where that was the thing I did there too! It was very nostalgic talking to my actual college roomate one day soon after we moved in and thinking the last time we were together was in our dorm room talking on our beds most likely! And of course Izzy is never very far from her "mommy".

Your Hands

2010-04-21T14:24:00.001-04:00

I am pretty sure I have posted this before but it's on my heart today and this song has truly become a lifeline to me during this time of change in our lives.

I have caught myself worrying about our finances and what our future looks like and I don't want to be that way. God has been so faithful to us up to this point and I know He is going to take care of the rest. I don't know what it's going to look like but one thing I do know is that no matter what He is in control. I'm writing this out today as I know there will come a day, could be later today, that I will need to listen to this song and reread my words and remind myself what I should be doing.

We have taken such a huge step of faith and it's pretty scary at times to really try and wrap my brain around it all. Steve has no job here. He wants to go to school. We still have bills to pay. We need money to live on. Kiersten wants to stay in gymnastics and that takes money. So many of my worries today are focused on money and I want to realease that into Papa's hands. He know my worries and my heart and I know He will take care of us.

Thank you God for bringing us this far and I know you will take care of us. Forgive my wavering heart and help me to trust in you. Thank you for all you are doing in our lives and give me a peaceful heart in the midst of not seeing how it will all work out. But I trust you and I know You are in control.

Kite Festival

2010-04-21T13:24:00.001-04:00

Kiersten and I went to a local kite festival this past Saturday and it was pretty cool! I was amazed at how large some of the kites were! It was cool to just sit and watch them go up and down with the winds. Made me wish Steve could be there as he loves kites and my girl wanted to fly one and I just wanted to sit and watch.

She loves it!

2010-04-20T16:29:00.000-04:00

Gymnastics is one of those things that I always wanted Kiersten to get into but didn't push it when she said no. She actually took a after school class in first grade at Artspace, where she went to school, and decided in her sweet little head that she knew everything there was to know about gymnastics! For those of you that know my girl, this won't surprise you at all! She can be quite stuck in her ways sometimes and I have no idea WHO she gets that from...lol!

She started doing gymnastics about 2 years ago and absolutely loves it! I'm glad I didn't force it on her when I wanted her to do it as I know she would most likely not like it as much as she does now. But I still digress...that's my girl! She even made the comment one day, after I told her how I wanted her to do it when she was little but she wanted nothing to do with it, her comment was well "why didn't you make me?!" OY!

So her first request when we told her about moving was to find a place as soon as possible for her to continue her gymnastics. So we found Xtreme Gymnastics and really love it! It's wonderful to see her fitting right in and enjoying it so much. And she was placed on a team right away and level 4, which is great! And I love the fact that there are bleachers I can sit and take pictures of her! Of course I'm sure she just rolls her eyes at me at times but I'm used to that!

Ramblings...

2010-04-18T22:43:00.000-04:00

Today has been a pretty hard day of missing my husband and my friends and just everything that is comfortable to me. I sat in church alone again trying to get over my feelings of every looking at me thinking that I'm a single mom or something like that. I know that sounds pretty vain but just the thoughts that run through my head! I haven't really talked to anyone yet and it never ceases to amaze how you can be in a huge group of people and still feel so very lonely. I know I should feel confindent to introduce myself but I just haven't been there. Thankfully I have met some wonderful ladies at a Thursday bible study but I don't seem to see many of them Sunday morning; I'm probaly just not looking to good either.

It's hard going from 7 years of home church to the corportate church and I'm just really missing the relationships and the community we had. Even in the times it was tough I still had a place to call "home" in their lives and they knew me. I'm trying hard not to be judgmental in the "program" part of the church as I know it has to run like that to make it work but it just makes me miss our home group so much. :( And not having Steve by my side is hard. I know things will have such a better outlook when he finally gets here and we can start this journey together. Today has been 30 days since he left and it's hard.

I'm amazed at how hard homesickness hits me sometimes and its really hard. I was fine when I woke up this morning and then came church and just sitting there by myself. And then knowing that this afternoon our friends were gathering for a garden party with our home church and really wanting to be there brought the tears. I had just posted something on facebook about being weepy for my friends and about 2 minutes after that my phone rang and it was a friend from home. As I looked at the picture id I about bursted out in tears and did when I heard her voice. I'm so thankful that Papa knew just what I needed at just the right moment. I have no doubt that He orchrastrated that call just for me.

I know it takes time...sigh....

This song is so much on my heart today and right where I am at...

What if?

2010-04-13T22:05:00.000-04:00

That is a phrase that I have never really liked much because there is so much you can't know or control by saying it. There is so much that can be left open in answering that question and so much uncertainity that it has always pretty much drove me crazy. :) There are questions that I don't mind dreaming about but being the concrete person that I am for the most part, I like to have a more direct questions and answers. Ones that I can really see the outcome. Or at least see happening rather than guessing "if" that could really happen.

Today I read Donald Miller's blog and it really challenged me to think of "what if" in a whole different light. I loved it! One of the phrases that stood out to me most in his blog was this...

"God gives life to you to live, and you can either tell meaningful stories or boring stories. We can’t wait around anymore for God to make something happen in our lives, meanwhile we shop at Bed Bath and Beyond. The truth is, God gives you wisdom and direction and morality and His presence and support, and then asks you to live, to conquer, to risk and experience the whole of life. People grow when they are in motion."

He challenged his readers to write down 5 things using the phrase "what if" and to pick one of them and actually follow through on one of them. The whole part of following through with one of them has been on my mind all day. I have honestly never let myself think this way and it was like God was opening up my heart to a new way of thinking. I sat and thought of the things that I would write down and the things that are going on in our lives right now. I feel like our lives are one big "what if" right now that we are living out. It's cool to see that we had already walked through this in a way and were living out a big "what if" For us that would be "what if we packed up all our belongings, put them in storage for a year, leave all of our friends and move 15 hours away to Missouri to where we have no work and Steve will go to school?" Sounds pretty crazy huh? But that is exactly what we are doing! God made things so clear that this was what we are to do but there is still so much that we don't know but we are walking it out in faith. And we are definately growing as we are in motion! This is hard, especially right now with Steve not being here, but we are growing and experiencing and walking it out. We are on a journey with a big "what if" and it's wonderful to know that God is in control even if we don't see it or know the outcome. We are doing it and His hand it guiding our every step. I will never see the big "what if" in the same way and for that I am thankful!

I Surrender!

2010-04-09T09:58:00.000-04:00

Our live seems to be in the huge upheaval right now and daily I am reminded that God is calling me to surrender everything to Him. Daily, well almost each second, I am falling back on Papa for his strength as I feel so weak these days. I'm excited for what God is doing in us right now as a family but it's hard to see the big picture right now. And I hold on tightly to the promises of God and the many confirmations that He gave us to bring us to the spot we are in right now.

I think the hardest part of it all right now is Steve being gone and feeling like my life is in this holding pattern until he gets here. I miss him so much. It's been 3 weeks today. I know there are so many people that don't have their spouses around them for much longer than that but this is new to me. But he is in the place that used to be our home and can be with all our friends if he wants and that is hard. I know his end is just as hard as mine with all the work he is doing and that he is working as fast as he can, but it's still just hard. I don't like it one bit.

I miss my friends so much too. I miss our girls nights out, daily lunches, movies, the chocolate lounge, just hanging out, working out with them, homeschool co-op and so much more. I hope they keep in touch with me and that the distance between us right now doesn't hinder those relationships. I miss how comfortable we are with each other and reaching out to make new friends is hard sometimes when all I want to do is go "home".

I'm excited for what God is doing in our lives right now and I need to be able to see the adventure in it all but sometimes it's hard. I"m so thankful that God knew that I needed to be able to fall back on His promises and His faithfulness of how He worked to bring us to where we are now because I remind myself of it all daily. I'm happy that we have a God that always finishes our story and never leaves us hanging. I may not be able to see the big picture right now but He does and that is all I need to know even when it's hard. I hold tightly onto what He has shown us and trust Him for the rest whenever that will be.

Today I surrender! I surrender my hopes, my dreams, my wants, my desires and I fall on His grace to see me through becasue I know He is good. Thank you Papa for bringing me to the spot I am in today, even when it's hard; especially when it's hard.

Remembering this today....

2010-04-09T09:39:00.001-04:00

I have unanswered prayers
I have trouble I wish wasn't there
And I have asked a thousand ways
That You would take my pain away
That You would take my pain away

I am trying to understand
How to walk this weary land
Make straight the paths that crookedly lie
Oh Lord, before these feet of mine
Oh Lord, before these feet of mine

When my world is shaking
Heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave Your hands

When You walked upon the Earth
You healed the broken, lost, and hurt
I know You hate to see me cry
One day You will set all things right
Yea, one day You will set all things right

When my world is shaking
Heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave Your hands

Your hands
Your hands that shape the world
Are holding me, they hold me still
Your hands that shape the world
Are holding me, they hold me still

When my world is shaking
Heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave You when...

When my world is shaking
Heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave...
I never leave Your hands

Chicken Chili Stew....yummy!

2010-04-06T22:23:00.000-04:00

This was in my email box this morning and it looked so good! So Rachel and I made it for dinner tonight and it was just as yummy as we had hoped! I have to say I was surprised seeing something that didn't have a whole stick of butter in it from Paula but I knew it was bound to be good just coming from her. We did a few things different but not too much.

*We didn't put in the jalepeno since we had little girls and I personally don't like spicy
*Cut down the chili powder some as well but it still had a good kick too it but not bad at all
*Added one more sweet potato
*We also didn't have the sour cream because we forgot it at the store but it was good without it too!

This will definitely be one of those keepers! Even my girl liked it and I was really surprised at that!

Chicken Chili Stew

Ingredients:

1 tablespoon canola oil
1 medium onion, chopped
1 yellow bell pepper, chopped
3 cloves garlic, chopped
1 small jalapeno, seeds removed and chopped
1 tablespoon chili powder
4 cups chicken broth
1 medium sweet potato, peeled and cubed
2 cups salsa verde, store bought
12 ounces leftover roast chicken meat, skinned and shredded into large pieces
1 (15 ounce) can pinto beans, drained and rinsed
1/2 cup packed fresh cilantro, chopped
Kosher salt and freshly ground pepper
1 avocado, diced, for garnish
Sour cream, for garnish

Directions

Heat oil in a large pot over medium high heat. Add the onion, bell pepper, garlic, and jalapeno and sauté until soft, about 4 minutes. Add chili powder and season with salt.
Stir in the chicken broth, sweet potato, and salsa verde, and bring to a boil. Reduce heat and simmer, stirring occasionally, until the sweet potato is just tender, about 10-12 minutes.
Stir in the shredded chicken and beans. Reduce heat to moderately low and simmer, covered, 10 minutes. Stir in cilantro at the end of cooking. Ladle into soup bowls and top with some diced avocado and a dollop of sour cream.
Paula’s Note: You can find Salsa Verde in the Latin Foods section of your grocery store.

The Butterfly Pavilion

2010-04-06T10:52:00.000-04:00

We visited a very cool place yesterday in Colorado that we loved! It's The Butterfly Pavilion and very very fun and educational. One of the coolest parts of it was the butterfly chrysalis that you could just stand and watch and we actually got to watched beautiful butterfly break out of it's cocoon! So neat! I think we could have all stood there and watched that for hours! The girls took a short class on the coral reef and the guy leading it was pretty fun and really got the kids involved. Love when a field trip turns into an educational thing!

Twelvefridays 3rd Annual Weekend Celebration announced!

2010-04-06T10:39:00.000-04:00

The 3rd annual Twelvefridays Weekend Celebration is finally announced and you can read about it all here! Make sure to become a follower to keep updated of exciting stuff to come!

No more shame!

2010-04-04T10:04:00.000-04:00

Today my Redeemer lives and my shame was nailed to the cross! Instead of shame, we have grace today because our Saviour died on the cross for us. My heart is truly overwhelmed this morning as I sit here and think about the hope that was birthed today so many years ago. Thank you Jesus for dying for us so that we may walk in your hope and grace. Thank you Papa for giving us your only Son so that we may live today. My heart is full today with your love and so thankful for the sacrafice that was made so that I may have eternal life in You and walk with You.

May I Never Lose the Wonder!

2010-04-04T01:06:00.000-04:00

O precious sight, my Savior stands,
Dying for me with outstretched hands.
O precious sight, I love to gaze,
Remembering salvation’s day,
Remembering salvation’s day.
Though my eyes linger on this scene,
May passing time and years not steal
The power with which it impacts me,
The freshness of its mystery,
The freshness of its mystery.

May I never lose the wonder,
The wonder of the cross.
May I see it like the first time
Standing as a sinner lost,
Undone by mercy and left speechless,
Watching wide eyed at the cost.
May I never lose the wonder,
The wonder of the cross.

Behold the God-man crucified,
The perfect sinless sacrifice.
As blood ran down those nails and wood,
History was split in two, yes,
History was split in two.
Behold the empty wooden tree,
His body gone, alive and free.
We sing with everlasting joy,
For sin and death have been destroyed, yes,
Sin and death have been destroyed.

May I never lose the wonder,
The wonder of the cross.
May I see it like the first time
Standing as a sinner lost,
Undone by mercy and left speechless,
Watching wide eyed at the cost.
May I never lose the wonder,
The wonder of the cross.

May I never lose the wonder,
The wonder of the cross.
May I see it like the first time
Standing as a sinner lost,
Undone by mercy and left speechless,
Watching wide eyed at the cost.
May I never lose the wonder,
The wonder of the cross.

Words and Music by Vicky Beeching

So excited!!!!

2010-04-01T23:44:00.000-04:00

To see these girls tomorrow!!! I really don't know if I'll be able to sleep much I am so happy we get to hang out with some of our best friends for a few days! We miss them so very much and after seeing them just about every other day for years their moving left a huge vacancy in us and the goodbye was brutal. But tomorrow we get to see them, hug them, hang out, laugh and just be...I can't wait! This last month has been a crazy whirlwind of activity and I have missed my best pal being there by my side. I so can't wait just to sit and chat and be with them and just be!!!! Awwww....it is going to be good!!!

We all need reminders sometimes!

2010-04-01T15:40:00.000-04:00

I attended a bible study this morning and God reminded me of some things I needed to hear and it was just what I needed. I was already stepping out of my comfort zone and going to a group of all new ladies and new church and debated over even going but once I got there I was so glad that I did. Even it if were just for what Papa said to my heart while we were there but was even pleasantly surprised at how comfortable I felt in the midst of all the newness and how welcome the ladies made me and Kiersten feel. It was so needed!

They are doing a Beth Moore bible study of Daniel and the video that was for today could not have been more perfect for me. We have gone through so much change in the past month and although we know we are doing what God has told us to do it isn't always easy and it is even easier to get my eyes on the circumstances and to start worrying about stuff.

Beth talked about the first verse below today and how so often Satan puts his seal on things and for alot of people, especially from those looking from the outside, it seems that things are finished. Just like when they rolled the stone over Jesus' grave as well! But God has different plans then those of man and causes good to come out of those situations. We took a huge step of faith to be where we are right now and I don't see the big picture but I know that God isn't going to bring us this far to leave us alone (or in the lion's den to be eaten alive!) We have put our trust in Him and followed His voice and I know that He will lead us the rest of the way.

I am missing my husband terribly and as I sit here wishing he were with me I have time to question what the heck we have done. Sometimes time is just a killer! And I'm missing the comfort of my friends and the easiness of our relationships that we have gained throughout the years of friendship. So much newness to take in all at once and it's not all easy, epsecially without my best friend at my side. But thankfully I have God on my side and reminded me of that so gently this morning and how easily I forget that when I get my eyes on my circumstances. My eyes are fixed on Him today as He gently reminded that He is right by my side and as long as we keep our eyes on Him we will be just fine!

Daniel 6:17-24 (New International Version)

¹⁷ A stone was brought and placed over the mouth of the den, and the king sealed it with his own signet ring and with the rings of his nobles, so that Daniel's situation might not be changed. ¹⁸ Then the king returned to his palace and spent the night without eating and without any entertainment being brought to him. And he could not sleep.

¹⁹ At the first light of dawn, the king got up and hurried to the lions' den. ²⁰ When he came near the den, he called to Daniel in an anguished voice, "Daniel, servant of the living God, has your God, whom you serve continually, been able to rescue you from the lions?"

²¹ Daniel answered, "O king, live forever! ²² My God sent his angel, and he shut the mouths of the lions. They have not hurt me, because I was found innocent in his sight. Nor have I ever done any wrong before you, O king."

²³ The king was overjoyed and gave orders to lift Daniel out of the den. And when Daniel was lifted from the den, no wound was found on him, because he had trusted in his God.

Some new layouts

2010-04-01T00:41:00.000-04:00

I did these at our event with did in Gatlinburg, TN and just wanted to share! ;)

Missing my Workout Buddies!

2010-04-01T00:38:00.000-04:00

This was our last day of Urban Fitness and I sure do miss these two gals! :( Just about as much as I miss working out! Can't beleive I actually just typed that! lol I had developed such a great routine of working out and with all the upheaval of moving and all I have gotten out of that and I so want to get into again...I need to get into it again!

I have checked out a few gyms down here and like a few of them but they still aren't "home" yet. I just need to take the plunge and sign up with one but it's hard not having Steve here for Kiersten right now as she doesn't want to join me too much these days when I go.

We had so much fun in downtown Asheville and tonight I just missing it all very much! :(

It's been quite the adventure!

2010-03-25T15:56:00.000-04:00

This is my first blog post from our new home in Missouri! It's been quite the adventrue to get here and I have a long story to share. I haven't had much time to blog so this poor little one has been neglected but I hope to change that and it's start right now!

I have to say that I never would have thought we would be living in Missouri and it just goes to show me that God has plans far greater than the piddly little ones I make and are much more important anyways!

To start our story, I have to go back about a year or so, and the feeling both Steve and I had that we were going to be moving. At the time we thought it was going to be to Virginia but that never panned out to anything as much as we really wanted it to. We didn't know what to do with what we were feeling and some words that we felt were from the Lord. Well...little did we know that He was preparing us for this move that wasn't on my radar at all!

We came to Missouri about a month ago for a homeschool retreat I was attending and Steve came along to do some painting he was hired for. While we were here a big job Steve had back in Asheville fell through and it made our future pretty bleak looking. It has been a tough year with the economy and painting was getting harder and harder to find and the good jobs just weren't there. We moved to Asheville 13 years ago for Steve to start painting with his dad and it had gone pretty good up to that point. To say the least, we were heavy hearted as to what our future was going to hold and what our next step was going to be. Steve had been working so hard to keep our family surviving and he was so tired. He wasn't sleeping well and his heart was racing at times with the stress of it all. We were at the end of ourselves and all we could do was cry out to God to take care of us and that is just what He did. Of course it didn't look at all like anything we had planned but we decided to take a huge step of faith and be obedient in it.

So about a month after returning from our trip to Missouri we packed up all our belongings and headed down the road.

The process of how that decision was made was quite a laborious one but one we knew was from God. Hard to swallow at times, as we were leaving the home we never thought we would and friends we would miss dearly. I think that is why God made so many things so very clear to us concerning this next step because He knew how hard it would be for us to leave. God answered a prayer of Steve's so specifically that there was no doubt we were to go on the adventure halfway across the US to where we are now. He completely took my argument out from under me and now that I look back on it that was pretty much the only way I would have moved from the spot we were in. Amazing how He knows us so well and just what we need to follow Him without abandonment.

Steve was feeling pretty low before all of this and really didn't feel that he had any marketable skills since all he has been doing for the last 14 years was painting. As we started praying about our future, Steve felt like he should go to school for EMT since he had been wanting to go to that years ago but never did as we didn't have the time or the money to do it. So the main part of our moving where we are now is for Steve to go to school and see where our future can lead to after that.

The most amazing part of all of this is to see how God had used His children in our lives and to see our story come to be right before our very eyes. It all started with Steve's prayer being answered that he thought was pretty crazy to pray but he did and we have learned that there is nothing too crazy for God to answer! It all started with that and God used two very wonderful people to make that happen and we are so very thankful for them. They offered space in their house for the next year and that is exactly part of what Steve prayed. Well not specifically that but that is how God chose to answer it and there was not question to us that that was the answer. We are so very thankful for their generous hearts and the beautuiful people that they are. And then we had so many people that provided for our move and in ways we had not ever expected. Our hearts are so full with gratitude to so many people that helped us get to where we are and it is amazing to see God use them in our lives.

Right now all we know for sure is that we are right where God wants us to be and for the next year we will be here while Steve goes to school in hopes to gain skills that will allow us to find a job that is much more stable for our future. And I have no doubt that will happen as I look back at how God moved mightly to bring us here and made it very clear to us in ways we can't question.

So that is how our adventure to where we are now began and I'm excited to see what God is going to do next. Of course, none of this comes without a lot of emotions attached to it but God is faithful to handle all the tears that have been cried because of such a big change. We miss our friends dearly and are so thankful for the bonds that are much stronger than any distance. We are excited to see what this adventure will bring in our lives and will keep the blog updated as it unfolds!

I am strong!

2010-01-27T10:12:00.000-05:00

I have been working out now for about 3 months and it's been quite the journey. I never thought I would actually like going to the gym but today I can honestly say that I do! That is quite the accomplishment as just walking into the door of the gym a few months ago made my stomach do flip flops! I am so much stronger today than when I started and it feels so good.

I had a emotional moment at the gym a couple of weeks ago and it was a wonderful realization of the above for me. I was working out with my personal trainer doing weights on the bosu ball (that is a half ball that you balance on that is very interesting to say the least!) and it was getting pretty difficult. I had to really push myself to keep going and all of the sudden I felt these emotions welling up in me that came out of nowhere. At that moment all I wanted to do was cry and I really didn't understand why. I instantly thought of the people on the show The Biggest Loser and how you see them cry during their workouts sometimes and how I really always wondered why. Other than the fact that I know they are working really hard and sometimes it's painful, the tears never made too much sense to me. But then I'm not the most emotional person sometimes either and it could be just that for me. I didn't let the tears come to the surface and contrinued to push through the workout but it was in that moment that I came to the realization that I am truly a strong person and that I can do this!

I got in the car and cried those tears that I had pushed down and it was one good cry. For the first time in a long while I felt a inner strength in me to know that no matter what I face I can push through it. Whether it is working out or something personal. And the most important part of this all was knowing that I wasn't and will never have to do this by myself. I have God on my side and rooting me on the whole way and always has been. So they were good cleansing tears that I am so thankful to have let come to the surface and I walked away with so much more understanding and appreciation for our inner strength and how we can push through so much more than we let ourselves think we can.

Our last girls night out...

2010-01-23T10:15:00.002-05:00

I couldn't decide if I wanted to do this now as it's quite the emotional time right now but then figured I should do it while the memory is fresh and the emotions raw...and real!

It's so hard to see Rachel and her family leaving but we are so happy for them to see what God is doing in their lives. Such bittersweetness all in one breath! Rachel and I have been friends for at least 8 years and they are years I hold very dear to my heart. She is the first person I call when just about anything happens, good and bad, and the one friend I know completely understands me even when I don't understand myself. Now that is a big task...lol! She is a treasure that I have had the priveledge of having in my daily life for many years now and that is something I don't take for granted. I know we will always remain friends and this isn't an end all but change is still hard. It's the little everyday things that I'm going to miss the most like meeting for lunch, seeing each other every Sunday, our homeschool group and so much more. I sit here realizing just how intertwined my life is with seeing her and her girls and how that is going to be so different from here on out. Sigh....

So above was our last girls night out and it was a wonderful one! We laughed like I don't think we ever had and it will be a memory that will get me (and I think the others) through the next few months of change. I love all of these girls so much and I'm so blessed to have them in my life.

Rachel...I love you friend now more than I ever even thought possible! I'm going to miss you like crazy and I look forward to the time when we will sit like this again and be able to chat face to face.

"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened. ~Theodor Seuss Geisel, attributed

Some layouts...

2010-01-16T12:51:00.000-05:00

I've actually done some scrapping for me in the last few months and it's been fun!

Frisee and Grape Salad with Walnuts and Blue Cheese

2010-01-16T11:36:00.000-05:00

My absolute favorite salad right now!

Frisee and Grape Salad with Walnuts and Blue Cheese

Ingredients

Vinaigrette

3/4 cup Zinfandel Vinegar

1/3 cup Shallot, finely chopped

1/2 cup Grapeseed Oil

Salad

Frisee and Mixed Greens

Mixed Grapes, halved

Toasted Walnuts, roughly chopped

Crumbled Blue Cheese

Kosher Salt and Freshly Ground Black Pepper

Directions:

*Combine the vinegar and shallot in a bowl. Slowly whisk in the grapeseed oil. Add more to taste if too acidic

*Toss all salad ingredients in a large bowl. Serve with vinaigrette on the side.

Note: Serving it this way allows you to eat the salad the next day as leftovers. If that is not your concern, the more proper way to serve it is to toss salad greens with just enough of the vinaigrette to coat the leaves. Season with salt and pepper. Toss in remaining ingredients and serve immediately.

Starting the Journey...

2010-01-12T11:14:00.000-05:00

I have been wanting to blog about this but just haven't taken the time to sit down and do it. Not to mention that it's one of those places that I have struggled with for almost a lifetime and sometimes it's hard to put all that down in writing. There are so many emotions attached to it. The "it" I am refering to is my struggle with my weight. I have never been a skinny girl and have had body issues for as long as I can remember. I have tried SO many ways to loose weight, some good and many bad, and nothing has ever really clicked for me. I even tried just being happy being who I am and where I was and that didn't work because I knew in my heart that I wasnt really happy being that person.

Like many people, I watch the Biggest Loser and sit there saying to myself that one day I will do that for me. But season after season I did nothing after the finale but wait for the next show to premiere. I finally had a "aha" moment during this last show that got me off the couch and serious about doing something. It was after I saw Tracey come back and run the mile she couldn't after the season opener and how good she looked. I sat there thinking "dang if she can do it I can too!" I didn't like her at all on the show and sad to say that motivated me some! But it was more than that too. There were many "aha" little moments that led up to that one and that one just topped it off for me.

So I decided to start using that gym membership that my husband got us about a year ago along with the personal trainer we had already paid for. Going to the gym was pretty hard at first thinking all the eyes were on me as I walked in. But I quickly got over that and know that really isn't the case. Now I go 5 days a week and sometimes more and I can actually say that I like it! I never thought those words would come out of my mouth! Really! And I meet with the personal trainer once a week right now. I'm getting ready to meet with a new one soon and am looking forward to that. I like how I feel after I have worked out and know that I am doing something good for my body and the results are starting to show.

The best part about all this is that I am starting to like the clothes I am wearing! I hate shopping and especially when I have to shop in the large woman's section. It's not that fun when all you want to do is cut the tag out of your clothes because you can't even face the size on it! I had a very happy day last week when I went into the regular department at Target for a pair of jeans and actually was down a size from what I took into the dressing room so had to go back and get a smaller size. You bet I did a funny little happy dance in that dressing room! This has been a huge motivation for me in the last couple of weeks and I am really liking shopping these days!

I had been doing Weight Watchers and wasn't seeing the results that I wanted so decided to stop that and start the Biggest Loser online program. I really like that! I am eating more food and loosing more weight and that is a good result. This is a life change for me and not just a diet "program". I have done those types of things and they never stick. Yes you may get some good results but that isn't anything that will be lasting. I am eating lots of good fruits and veggies, organic meats, and concentrating on the amount of calories and that is working great. Something that I can make a lifestyle.

So this the yet another begining to this journey I have been on for some time, but one that I feel stronger and more passionate about than ever before. Something has definitely clicked in me this time and I'm running with it!

Merry Christmas!!!

2009-12-23T10:34:00.002-05:00

From our family to yours we wish you a very

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

May you know the true joy of this season as we celebrate Jesus

and may His peace reign in your heart today and always!

Love,

Steve, Heather and Kiersten :)

December 09 snow!

2009-12-18T12:40:00.000-05:00

Kiersten was one very happy girl to wake up to snow this morning! She built a pretty cute snowman too! Love the addition of the swimming goggles on the last one!

Book Review of The Terrestria Chronicles

2009-12-07T19:16:00.000-05:00

Terrestria Chronicles by Ed Dunlop
Ages: 10 and up

Price: $7.99 per book or $47.99 for the entire series

Visit the kingdom of Terrestria, a land where knights and their ladies live in castles and hwere dragons still roam (occasionally).

The Terrestria Chronicles allegory series was written with a three-fold purpose: to honor Jesus Christ as King, to challenge young readers to love and serve Him, and to teach them to guard their hearts for Him. The focus of the series is always on the King.

Fast-paced action… powerful imagery… heart-pounding adventure… These life-changing books are captivating and once you start reading, you’ll find them hard to put down. This adventure series has a particularly strong appeal to today’s young people: it’s a series with knights and castles, dragons and princesses. . . but these are books in which every page points to truths of the Christian walk. Biblical doctrines and character principles are taught in such a compelling, fascinating way that they will stay with the reader for a lifetime.

Written for ages ten and up, the Terrestria series is ideal for family devotions, classroom use, or individual enjoyment. So grab your sword and take your family on a quest to Terrestria! Your heart will be changed forever.

Also available: Visits to Terrestria , $5.99

A Study Guide for Parents, Teachers, and Students

Covering all seven books in the Terrestria Chronicles allegory series, this study guide is designed to invoke discussions of the life-changing messages and powerful imagery within each story, much of which might be missed with a casual reading. Visits to Terrestria takes the reader to a new level of understanding of the series. Adults and young people alike will more fully grasp the wealth of meaning in these captivating books.

My Review:

I have fallen in love with these books and so has my family! They captivated us from the very first page and pulled us right in. They are books that are written to share the message of the gospel to children and they do such an excellent job. I love allegory books like The Chronicles of Narnia and Hinds Feet on High Places and these books will earn a special place on our bookshevles by them.

We read the first book in the series, The Sword, the Ring and the Parchment.

In this book we were introduced to Prince Josiah, who is a slave to Argamor in the land of Terrestria. Argamor represents Satan and is the evil villian in the book. We also learn of a character called King Emmanuel who represents Jesus. The characters come alive in these books in such wonderful ways! This was one of the first books that I have read to my girl where she asked me to continue to hear more of the story. That alone is worth more that gold to me! We couldn't wait to get to the end and were thankful that we have more to go through in this amazing series. Ed Dunlap has such a great way with words and makes some very complex spirtitual concepts so easy to understand. As I was reading, I just had to stop and marvel at how he did it!

There is a study guide that goes along with the books as well and we loved that. There are so many options and great questions that are given for each book and very easy to follow along with. And there are even activities that you can do together as a family that looked pretty cool. We didn't get a chance to do any of them because of time but I look forward to hopefully getting to some of them as we read the rest of the series.

I could not recommend these books highly enough! If you are looking for books that will capture your childs (and adults!) attention from the very first page then look no further! And better yet books that display the message of the gospel in such a clear fun way. I have a little girl that loved these books so I can only imagine what someone with boys would say as they are full of adventure, knights, dragons, kings, and so much more!

Thank you Ed Dunlap for creating such a wonderful series and introducing us to a new set of books that will earn a special place on our bookshelves and will hopefully be passed down to many others in our family and beyond.

(Disclosure: We were provided this series, free of charge, by Ed Dunlop, in association with MamaBuzz.)

First Snow of the Year!

2009-12-06T10:50:00.001-05:00

Being the Ohio girl that I am, it still makes me laugh to see my little girl all dressed up in her snow gear to play with a few little drops of snowflakes! But we will take what we get as I surely don't want to move back up north to see more of this stuff. And she enjoys it no matter how little there is so that counts for something! At least we get some here.

Dirt

2009-12-02T09:10:00.001-05:00

We just finished up our Apologia Zoology 1 book and today we are having a bug party! So I made these really easy "dirt" cups to take along. You are supposed to use chocolate pudding for the bottom as well but I decided the chocolate cookies were enough chocolate so vanilla pudding balanced it out nicely.

All you do for this fun easy snack is:

3 packages of instant vanilla pudding
milk
Oreos or any chocolate cookies
Gummie worms/bugs (I found some bugs and worms at Target)
Some clear cups so they can see it all

Make the pudding as directed on package and put in cups (I have about 3/4 cup in each)
Put about 20 cookies in a zipbloc baggie and pound away (a great way to get out any frustration!)
Put this on top of the pudding until you are almost to the top of the cup
Then simply place the bugs around on the tops
Done!
This made 9 and I had plenty left over to do more.

Enjoy!

Purple Trail Review

2009-11-27T12:46:00.007-05:00

I love to entertain and have parties so anything that helps me keep that organized and have fun with that is perfect for me! I also love to send cards so that was just another reason I was excited to review this site. Purple Trail is just that online tool! Here are some quick facts about this very cool site:

1. PurpleTrail is totally ad-free. So your guests do not see any pesky ads along with your invites.
2. PurpleTrail has hundreds of pre-designed online invites, ecards and announcements. You could choose one and send it as it is OR customize it and make it yours by adding your own photos, videos, music and embellishments.
3.You could choose to even make your design from scratch. The PurpleTrail Design Centre makes it all very simple and easy for you to use.
4. Easily share your invite over social media sites like twitter and facebook.
5. It's easy to import your guest list from your yahoo/gmail/hotmail account.
6. PurpleTrail has features/modules keeping track of your guests, chatting with your guests in real time, adding a map to the event venue, pot-luck feature which helps each guest specify what they are getting for the party. And many more which makes your life easy as a party-planner.
7. PurpleTrail takes care of all your party planning needs from the start to finish. Besides invites you could design your own thank-you cards that could be sent post the event. Share your party photos and videos with your guests and vice-versa. The PurpleTrail party blog helps you come up with the invites wordings, party ideas, games, craft activities, decor and recipes for your event.
8.PurpleTrail was the first service where you could send invites over sms
9. You can even Print your invites, cards and announcements from PurpleTrail.com
10. Easy to use Interface and a reliable service.

Price: Depends on which membership you choose.....memberships range in price from free to $49.95 per year.
http://help.purpletrail.com/getting-started/purpletrail-club-membership

Here is a video that will explain it as well...

Pros that I found:
1. The are hundreds of different choices to choose from in just about any holiday or event you may be looking for.
2. You can directly import or address book from yahoo/hotmail or google for sending out your cards and invitations

3. The ability to design your own from scratch and even to change the premade ones a little with different backgrounds, texts and removing objects you may not want or moving to a different place on the card

4. The ability to see what others have designed and even use them for your own
5. You can save your design and re-edit it at any time later on
6. Different levels of membership and one is free
7. The thank you that you can send out to your guests after the party is over

Cons that I found:
1. I don't think it's the most user friendly site as I got lost a few times and couldn't figure out where I needed to be
2. I had some trouble importing some pictures on a few cards I was trying to make and thought that could be easier to do
3. You can print a card you make for the price of $3.95 which I think was kind of high. But if you get the yearly membership you get to print them for free.
4. The site did seem a little slow at times

Overall, I like the Purple Trail and would recommend it to everyone.

*This is a Mama Buzz review, and we were provided a free trial to Purple Trail in exchange for a review of their website.

When Moms Pray Together Book Review

2009-11-27T12:20:00.000-05:00

This is a Mama Buzz review. The product was provided by: Tyndale Publishing for this review

When Mom's Pray Together is a book by Fern Nichols that tells 25 true stories of what happens when moms come together to pray.

Here is some info from their website about the book:

Moms in Touch International is an organization that brings moms together to pray for their children and their children’s schools. As MITI prepares to celebrate its 25th anniversary, Fern Nichols, the founder and president, has collected some of the most inspiring and encouraging stories of God’s work in answer to those prayers. When Moms Pray Together will inspire and equip mothers to pray more consistently and hopefully for their children while encouraging them through the stories from moms everywhere.

Each chapter in this book is a true story about a child facing some sort of hardship and how their mom gets involved in a prayer group during this time. If you ever questioned if there is really power in prayer this book with put that question to an end. No matter how big or small the problem may be, prayer is something that brought these moms together and changed the lives of each child mentioned in this book. Each story pulls your heart right in and you can't wait to read the outcome of each one. Whether it's dealing with a child suicide, being bullied, sexual trauma, divorce, there is nothing too big or small to pray about and this book shows you just that.

As I finished this book all I wanted to do was get down on my knees and thank God for the beautiful daughter that He has given me and for the wonderful gift of prayer that we have that allows us to touch His heart in ways nothing else can. It gave me hope that no matter what we have and what we will face is nothing we can't handle through prayer.

I encourage you to read this book and have your heart filled with the hope I did. And even get involved in a local Moms In Touch group if there is one near you or even start your very own. I know my heart has been moved in ways to really be committed to praying more for my daughter and even her friends and any way I can do that I am all for!

Jansten's Gift

2009-11-27T11:44:00.001-05:00

(Disclosure: This book was provided , free of charge, by Hachette Book Group, in association with MamaBuzz.)

Jansten's Gift captured my heart from the very first chapter. It was one of those books that I could hardly put down until I reached the last sentence. It is a true story of loss, grief, hope and passion. I'm not a big crier but this book brought tears to my eyes many times. The writing is so refreshing and you really feel like you are sitting on the couch having a conversation with the author. It is one of those books that makes you want to hug your family closer at the end of the night and to make sure you are living your life to the fullest. This book is raw and I think that is why I loved it so much. Pam does not hide her feelings at all and she writes her true feelings, even if they may offend some. I love so much when people are real no matter what!

Our of her grief, Pam and her family end of going to Vietnam over Thanksgiving. This trip changed their life and the life of so many others that she would touch through the organization they started called Touch A Life. They have adopted two children from there and these children helped heal her heart from the grief of her son Jansten. The organization that Pam and her husband started has a main focus to stand in the gap for hurting and explointed children and to give them a voice. You can find out more about them here.

This is one of those books that makes you realize you don't have to be somebody important to help others. It makes you feel that no matter what may come in your life that you can pick up the pieces and make a difference and simply go on living. I'm so thankful that Pam shared her story in this book and I plan on sharing it with many of my friends.

Here is a quote from the back cover:

"This is a story of a journey that took seven years and the loss of everything I had. What I learned along the way is that maybe the answer to grief, or to feeling lost, is to give recklessly and passionately. It is in those acts of giving that you become open to receive life's most tremendous blessings."

A Description of the book from Hachette Book Group:

Nine years ago, Pam Cope owned a cozy hair salon in the tiny town of Neosho, Missouri, and her life revolved around her son's baseball games, her daughter's dance lessons, and family trips to places like Disney World. She had never been out of the country, nor had she any desire to travel far from home.

Then, on June 16th, 1999, her life changed forever with the death of her 15-year-old son from an undiagnosed heart ailment.

Needing to get as far away as possible from everything that reminded her of her loss, she accepted a friend's invitation to travel to Vietnam, and, from the moment she stepped off the plane, everything she had been feeling since her son's death began to shift. By the time she returned home, she had a new mission: to use her pain to change the world, one small step at a time, one child at a time. Today, she is the mother of two children adopted from Vietnam. More than that, she and her husband have created a foundation called "Touch A Life," dedicated to helping desperate children in countries as far-flung as Vietnam, Cambodia and Ghana.

Pam Cope's story is on one level a moving, personal account of loss and recovery, but on a deeper level, it offers inspiration to anyone who has ever suffered great personal tragedy or those of us who dream about making a difference in the world

A Wonderful Turkey Day!

2009-11-27T10:47:00.001-05:00

We had a wonderful Thanksgiving spent with our friends. I made some Turkey cupcakes (no not meat ones!) for the kids. All you have to do is make chocolate or vanilla cupcakes and frost with chocolate icing, stick a nutter butter cookie in the front for the head of the turkey, and then take fruit rollups and put two together and then cut out in a feather shape and stick them in the back of the cupcake with a toothpick. Very easy! I felt very thankful yesterday sitting around with table with some old and some new friends and blessed that each one of them are such an important part of my life.

Wow Imports Personlized Necklace Review

2009-11-27T09:57:00.004-05:00

This is a Mama Buzz review. The product was provided by: WOW Imports for this review

I had the wonderful opportunity to receive the above necklace to review from WOW Imports. Here is some info about who they are from their website:

Wow! Imports, a family business, is the premier online store for African fair trade bead & wire art, including beaded animal figurines, piggy banks, beaded key chains, beaded zipper pulls, wire wrapped and beaded serving pieces, beaded Christmas ornaments and recycled plastic bag animals.
We offer the widest selection of styles and languages of handmade sterling silver and 14k gold personalized name jewelry. This includes Carrie necklaces, name necklaces, name rings, name earrings, name bracelets, name anklets, personalized key chains & zipper pulls and personalized cufflinks.
Our master artisans are dedicated to handcrafting the finest wire & bead art, recycled art and name jewelry.
We are committed to socially responsible and fair trade practices. Our African crafters are disadvantaged artisans from Zimbabwe and South African townships. They set their own wages and hours and are provided with materials and pleasant work accommodations. We provide them with useful customer feedback to help them create the finest and most marketable designs.

The personalized name necklace I chose is pictured above and I put my daughters name on it and will give it to her for christmas that has a value of $27.95. It is the Gabrielle font with a 18inch sterling silver necklace.They have a large variety of fonts to choose from and I really liked that on their website you could put in the name you want and it would let you go through the fonts to see what they looked like before you order. I was also able to choose the length of the chain I wanted for the necklace. You can also get different items added to your name such as flowers for an extra price of $5.95. You could even get a birthstone added to your necklace for an extra price as well. There are so many different choices and it's fun to look through their website to see them all. I liked the animal and sports personalized name jewelry too!

I was very impressed with my necklace and I would recommend this for that fun personalized gift you want to get for that special someone in your life. I am very impressed with the vision that this company has and I like supporting companies that are committed to fair trade practices. And they offer free shipping which is a big plus in my book!

GIVEAWAY:

Win a personalized name necklace (up to $27.95) for one lucky winner!

To Enter:

Just visit WOW Imports and let me know which necklace you will choose if you are the lucky winner!

**make sure to leave your email so I can contact you if you win!**

For EXTRA entries:

**you must leave a separate comment for each one of these you do**

1. Blog about this on your blog and leave a comment on here telling me you did so.

2. Put this on your wall on facebook

3. Tweet about this

4. Follow me with google friends (the link is on the bottom right hand side of my front page of my blog)

5. Add my button to your blog (this is located on the bottom right hand side on the main page of blog as well)

Contest will end on Friday December 4th at midnight

You may enter once each day until them as many times as you like on that day!

US participants and shipping only

Thanks for entering! And a huge thanks to WOW Imports for their generous offer!

Wright on Time Review Arizona Book 1 Review

2009-11-24T14:22:00.003-05:00

This is a Mama Buzz review. The product was provided by: Wright on Time Books for this review.

Kiersten and I have been reading a new series of books that we are just loving. It is about a homeschooling, or "roadschooling" as one of the kids puts it, family that travels in a RV across the United States and the adventures they face along the way. We have really enjoyed the first book and I plan on ordering more to continue or study on the 50 states. I love that it's about a homeschooling family since I don't know of too many books out there that are geared toward us.

This books starts off in Arizona with a family starting their "roadschooling" adventure by exploring a cave that they rented out for the day. The adventure that follows for them is pretty exciting!

The books are very educational in nature as well and we learned a lot from them. It was the perfect time for us as well as we were studying about bats in our Apologia Zoology book and this fit right in! Love when that kind of stuff falls into place! The book captured my daugters attention from the start and she looked forward to our reading time every day to find out what was happening next.

I would highly recommend these books, for homeschoolers and regular schoolers, as they are just wonderful! They are a great length as well, not too long and not too short. We finished the book in a week and that was just perfect for us. My only wish was that I had another one on hand to keep going!

Here is a video you can watch to find out more about the Wright on Time Book 1 on Arizona:

You can find the book on their website here or on Amazon at this link.

The Ultimate Cloth Review and Giveaway!

2009-11-21T17:51:00.000-05:00

This is a Mama Buzz review. The product was provided by the makers of the Ultimate Cloth for this review. I was not compensated for this review.

The Ultimate Cloth is eco-friendly solution for homes as well as a money and time saver. The Ultimate Cloth is a brand new technology – in fact, it is the only cloth to receive a new patent in the last 25 years. The Ultimate Cloth is a simple, green and effective one-step cleaning process. The Ultimate Cloth cleans any hard surface – glass, wood, granite, stainless steel and many more – with just water! No longer do you have to use harsh chemicals in your home, nor do you need spend hundreds of dollars per year buying them. The Ultimate Cloth has been lab tested to remove 96% of bacteria, without the use of chemicals. And, can cut 50% off your cleaning time. The Ultimate Cloth is truly the ultimate in green cleaning.

Sounds pretty cool huh?! I do have to say I was pretty skeptical that just one cloth could do all that and then some! I had been looking for a new cleaning cloth ironically, so this came at the perfect time. I put it to the test on my ultimate thorn, my glass top stove. And I am happy to say that it worked marvelous and I was one happy girl! It left no streaks and normally hard to remove stains came right off with just water. Normally, I would have to let the stain soak overnight and then my husband would have to use his "elbow grease" to get it out even at that. To be able to have it work that well on that so quickly I was sold instantly! I cleaned my whole kitchen and I was very happy. I do have to say I love the smell of some cleaners so I did miss that a little, but to have the results that I did are well worth it! It did wonderfully in the bathroom as well and it was nice to just have one cloth to clean everything I needed. I love this thing!

And having just gotten over the swine flu, I was wanting to lysol my whole house but with this I didn't feel the need to with it's 96% rate of removing bacteria. It worked great cleaning my ITouch, cell phone and ipod too!

The price of this cloth is $6.00 and well worth every sent! And you can get one for free too!

All you need to do is follow Ultimate Cloth America on Twitter or become a fan on facebook:
Twitter: http://twitter.com/Ultimate_Cloth
facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Ultimate-Cloth-America/209222110335?v=wall&ref=ts

They will reveal how to get the free Ultimate Cloths via Twitter and facebook. Give it a try....I think you will really like it!

Girl Talk Book Review

2009-11-04T16:22:00.003-05:00

Girl Talk is a book put out by Five Star Publications and is written by Gigi Garner (who is the daughter of James Garner).

Reading this book was like sitting in your living room or around your kitchen table with a bunch of girlfriends just chatting. It was a very quick and easy read. I laughed, could relate, learned and enjoyed the stories of the many wonderful women that shared for this book. I think that it would make a great gift for the friend you don't really know what to get.

The only downside that I see to the book is that the price it a little high at $15.95 in my opinion. I think if it could be a little smaller in size to nicely tuck inside a gift basket or even mail in a card that would be a great idea.

It's one of those books that is nice to just sit around, like in the bathroom because who doesn't like to read in the bathroom! I liked that you could pick up anywhere and read some fun stories, glean some good advice and just sit and relax with some good friends.

As far as recommending it, I am on the fence for the reasons above as the price and the size of it, but I am very pleased to been given the opportunity to read it. I definitely learned some fun new ways to use olive oil, some great recipes, a proven stain remover, some wonderful stories of hope and stories that made me laugh.

**This is a Mama Buzz review. The product was provided by Five Star Publications for this review.

Another Twelvefridays Giveaway!

2009-11-02T20:09:00.000-05:00

Check out the blog for more details on how to be included!