It's Real!

Feb 9, 2011
Last week was our first visit to the doctor and our first ultrasound.  As I sat there laying on the table, my heart felt like it was about to burst.  I knew I was pregnant already, but actually seeing the baby for the first time was blowing my mind a bit!  After you deal with infertility for so long it almost feels senseless to hold on to hope at times and I had given up on quite awhile ago actually.  My mind was struggling with my age, the timing of it all and just the simple fact of could this really be?!  All the years of crying out to God to open up my womb again with nothing but silence had come to an end.  And it had been a couple of years since I had really even thought about it anymore.  I had come to terms with our little family of three and was, quite honestly, pretty happy with it!  We were really going to be starting over again?  So many thoughts rushing through my head as the doctor squeezed some warm jelly on my stomach and all of the sudden my world stopped.  The baby appeared on the screen and all I could think of is "it's real!"  It's not some joke I dreamed up or some nightmare I wanted to forget about.  There is an actual baby growing inside me and one that only God could have put there.  11 years of infertility and finally a baby.  Not the timing that I would have chose at all, but I'm coming to terms with that.  And then just peace...sweet peace that only comes from the Father!  You know the phrase "seeing is believing"? well that was what I needed to move forward with so many of my emotions that were whirling around in my head and heart.  I just layed there in complete utter peace watching the baby move around on the screen and for the first time since taking the pregnancy tests I had complete peace.  Beautiful sweet peace.  Peace in knowing that God was in complete control of this time; peace in knowing that I didn't have to understand it all; peace that He was going to take care of all our worries and needs; peace that this baby was truly a gift from Him and He was going to take care of everything.  We are starting quite a new journey ahead and it's going to be very interesting to say the least.  :)  


  1. Rae said...:

    Soooo happy for you!! Congratulations!

  1. Shannon Taylor said...:

    I am just so utterly happy for you! It may a journey that came later than sooner but OH IT WILL BE A GREAT ONE!!! Big hugs my wonderful friend!

  1. Shannon shared your news with me and sent me your blog link. I think of you often and I'm over the moon for you and your amazing news!! Congrats to you and the fam. :) I will be following your journey on your blog and I'm sending hugs to you!

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